We celebrated my twin sisters’ birthday in April with a balloon release. Both have passed away, and we buried Colleen in March. I have experienced a plethora of emotions since. When asked if I wanted to say something at the celebration, I kept it short because I could not find the words to adequately describe what I was feeling at that moment.

Having twelve siblings and being raised with only one of them creates a dynamic difference from any other I have experienced. However, my relationship with Colleen always felt genuine. When I came around, she gave me the biggest hug and kiss, and I could feel real love coursing through my body all the way to my toes.

Colleen was generous with her time, inviting me to play on the softball team with her and her classmates. She proudly introduced me to her closest friends and when I had a performance during my time at PV, she and her children were in the audience clapping loudly when I was on stage. When I walked across the stage at graduation, I felt she was prouder of my accomplishment than I was. Colleen was fun and easy to be around, and she did not hesitate to include me in an activity she thought I would be interested in. That’s the kind of sister she was.

I loved her relationship with her children. She loved them unconditionally and was proud of them, and her grandchildren. They are amazing individuals who will keep her legacy alive and thriving.

It’s no secret that Colleen loved to dance. It’s also no secret that I have the least rhythm when it comes to dancing, and Colleen was the most patient in trying to teach me the steps. She would slowly go through each step with me until I got the basics.

No, we did not agree on everything and sometimes were at odds. No sibling relationship is perfect. At the end of the day, Colleen was consistent and will always be one of the most beautiful, loving, kind, generous human beings I know. And though I did not live or grow up in the same house as Colleen, she treated me the same regardless. She was one of my biggest cheerleaders and supporters, and she made me feel seen.

Thank you, Colleen, for being an important part of my life. I have no regrets and cherish every moment. And though I wish you were still physically here, I’m happy you’re not suffering and are at peace. Thank you for being one of the absolute best big sisters I could have ever imagined. I love you.